April 23rd, 2024

CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?
Have you ever been asked to keep a secret? Like a huge secret? A potential life changing secret?
​Well I have recently and I can’t decide if it’s a burden or a privilege that I have been tasked with this. And as a complete oversharer usually, I am in unchartered waters.
But actually as the days go on, I’ve realised it’s fun to keep the secret and the secret I have been tasked to keep is so big, I honestly am in no rush to tell anyone. Not even a hint or a clue. It’s all mine.
It’s human nature to want to share news and as a blogger and journalist, it’s what I do daily but this time, this secret being protected in a little incubator with a three pin password and verification code implanted in my brain. The fact that it’s been trusted solely with me is making start each day with a little skip and a jump of joy too. I feel special.
According to a study published by the American Psychological Association keeping good news a secret before telling someone else could make people feel more alive.
“Positive secrets that people choose to keep should make them feel good, and positive emotion is a known predictor of feeling energized,” said  Michael Slepian, PhD, an associate professor of business at Columbia University. “While negative secrets are far more common than positive secrets, some of life’s most joyful occasions such as pregnancy and engagements begin as secrets. (The research was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.)
We’re taught as kids that keeping secrets is bad and therapists tell us everyday that it’s better to talk it out… but I’m just letting you know that I’m not telling  a soul. Shhhhh. Don’t even ask. This cat is staying firmly in the bag and my lips are sealed. Ask me about anything else,  I’m eager to overshare details of the shitty things the callous ex did and I’m happy to divulge updates on my fluctuating bank accounts and news surrounding my dysfunctional family and the trauma they laid on me, but this particular secret is strictly confidential. It’s actually so much fun to keep. And don’t worry, no one’s been murdered.
There are times when keeping a secret can be a burden on your soul, like if you find out someone you love has been cheated on; do you tell them or risk being accused of trying to break up a relationship. Some people are so blinkered they’re unwilling to see the truth regardless and you can end up being the bad guy. Ultimately people keep secrets to protect their reputation or someone else's. People keep secrets to hide their shame of drug dependency or other addictions and that’s not advisable as they’re denying themselves the chance to get help and it’s never good to struggle alone.Fortunately my big little secret isn’t going to affect anyone’s mental health and I think I am beyond help anyway. I am at an age when I am past caring what people think of me now. As long as my kids are happy and I am not hurting anyone then I am doing no harm.My circle is so tight now it’s like a little dot. I trust no -one so ironically I have no one to share my secret with anyway. So actually this blog is irrelevant. 
I’ll shut up then and go about my business as usual. With a little smirk that I know something you don’t.

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