June 30th, 2024

YOU ARE WHAT YOU WEAR:
​I went on a lunch date last week and my friend asked me what I was wearing and told me not to go over the top. If you know anything about me, if someone tells me not to do something, I’ll do it twice with a cherry on top. The date was lunch at a pool bar in 33 degree heat so I wore a shiny gold metallic bikini covered with an animal print short dress and oversized black shades and Moschino sandals.. She said it gave off ‘90s mobster wife vibes and I laughed. That look is very much en vogue and Mob wife fashion is synonymous with opulence, exuding a sense of confidence and authority. Which is basically me.
I am way past looking for validation for what I wear, especially from a man. If he doesn’t like my style, that’s not my problem.  And if I come across as too confident? That’s on him, I’m not extra, he just isn’t enough.
It’s been over a year since I have been on a date, I haven’t been bothered to and no one has matched up to my level of interest. But it was fun to dress up and it got me thinking about the effort women go to to impress a man. Not me, I dress for me. I do my hair, lashes and nails for me to make myself feel good. 
Women spend most of their lives being dictated to by men about how to dress whether we like it or not.  According to a 2023 report on diversity by the British Fashion Council, despite women making up the majority of customers, most senior roles in fashion are held by men. 
More than 85% of graduates  from top fashion schools are female, but only around 14% of the top 50 major fashion brands are run by women. In America less than 50% of the top womenswear brands are run by women. Isn’t that shocking and so wrong? 
It’s bad enough that society dictates what size we should be in order to appear attractive but how are men holding the majority of management positions in women’s fashion? Men think they know women. Sorry let me rephrase that. Men think they know everything. 
Our clothes alter at different stages of the month. Men can’t possibly understand how we feel when we’re on our period, are pregnant, have given birth, are going through menopause and our clothes have to reflect that.
What we wear says a lot about us – it can reveal our personal style, values, and even our moods. In many ways, the clothes we choose to buy are a form of self-expression, and can communicate a lot about who we are and what we stand for. You’ll never catch me in a floatie floral summer dress to my ankles. At 5ft 2 it will look like I’ve stepped out in a duvet cover.
My clothes are my personal signature, as are yours. Wear what makes you feel comfortable and gorgeous.  Your clothes don’t matter to anyone but yourself, so let go of others' expectations of how you should dress. 
Ironically if you ask a man’s opinion on “how do I look?” he’ll stand there terrified of saying the wrong thing. So change the script. Ask yourself how you feel in the outfit you stand in. The most important thing to remember is that we all have flaws and there isn’t such a thing as the perfect body. We all have beautiful features. And ultimately the most stunning thing you will wear is your confidence and your smile and people will always judge you no matter what you slip on.
I have been in the fashion PR industry for over 20 years and run Liverpool Fashion Week.  Style in the high street reinvents itself like the ra-ra skirt, probably because the men at the top are managing what lines go in store. Wouldn’t it be ever so refreshing if women were put in charge?. Sorry not sorry. 
I stand for “don’t fuck with me.” It’s a liberating style, you should try it.
And if you’re wondering how the date went, he’s caught my attention. I think I may see him again and I have just the outfit in mind.

---